Planner Feature: Smiling Through Chaos
Amanda Hudes, Owner and Creative Director of Smiling Through Chaos, recently stopped by The Grooms Den to talk about her experience as a well sought-after wedding and event planner in the Tri-State area. A creative leader with years of experience working in different industries and catering to the creative needs of others, Amanda decided to create a company that prioritized the joy of others at the center of her service, hence the start of Smiling Through Chaos; even during the interview Amanda shared how Smiling Through Chaos was created to help “people celebrate life, and help them look and feel their best for their event.” Committed to her craft as a planner, Amanda’s signature planning style is seen through her creativity with every event her company plans “always look[ing] different from the last.”
Check out highlights from our conversation below as we learn more about how Amanda began working in the wedding industry, her insight about the groom's experience and how it’s changing for the better, and as well as wedding locations and venues you might want to consider as you plan your big day or even your vow renewals.
SPEAKERS
Amanda Hudes, Cameron Fontaine
Cameron Fontaine
The first wedding you ever did, did you stumble into it or did you make a decision that this was the career path you were going to be on?
Amanda Hudes
Yeah, I made a decision. So at first I was in fashion and product development and then I was in management. And so when I was leaving management in the corporate setting, I was also planning their events. And people would always say to me, "why are you not getting stressed planning this event?" And [my response] was "no, this is fun and I love this." And [since] I don't love the politics in corporate, I wanted to create a business where I could be creative for people and help them celebrate using my experience, but not allow for the politics [to hinder their experience].
Cameron Fontaine
Can we talk a little bit about how you service your groom clients and how you are able to cater to their needs specifically?
Amanda Hudes
Yeah, I mean, we pay attention to them. A lot of people just don't and they kind of pretend they're not there. I've had more grooms in the past year be involved than ever before. They've been very involved in the planning and they want to be included [throughout the whole process]. And sometimes it can be a little challenging because usually brides are not used to be having the groom be as involved as they are now. But [by participanting in the planning] it also starts out their partnership as a true partnership. And what's been really cool to see is iif the bride is really busy with something in life, like changing jobs or something like that then the groom says, "Don't worry about it. I got it."
Cameron Fontaine
What are some of the tactics that you have or some of the methodology that you're using to encourage [the groom] to participate?
Amanda Hudes
When I'm talking to [the couple] in the consultation, I'm really speaking to both of them. I'm not just speaking to the bride and letting her own the answer; I'm asking her questions and I'm also asking him questions. I’m also connecting with the couples on social media. So I [try] to get to know both of them really well. The other piece of [why that connection is important] is because if you're a couple and you have this wedding planner come in, you don't know them that well in the beginning, right? [When we’re able to connect and learn more about each other] you can feel 100% comfortable with the wedding planner, because you know who they are and what they're about. Because I will speak to them exactly the same way as I speak to them in front of each other as well as separately, [I make sure the environment] is very professional as well as fun and friendly. Yeah, so how I communicate is like a friend. And I say [to my clients] how you can think of me from the very beginning is you are part of the Smiling Through Chaos family. You are family, we are friends, we are forever friends. And I want them to know that they could always come to me for anything and talk to me. And so it's that level of trust from the beginning that has to be there and then it’s just smooth.
Cameron Fontaine
So by being as open and clear with the communication when you're starting to roll out in the planning process what are the elements to your process, as you're finding, that grooms kind of like drawn to the most. Like I know that a lot of times the grooms like to choose the dj or -
Amanda Hudes
- The music and the food and the venue. Those are the biggest things. Yeah, they don't care as much about the decor, although they will say they don't care and then when I bring it up, they're like, "okay, and what about this?." So they do get involved [in those things] but that's more of when I'm more explaining things [about the decor]. [However], the music, 100%, they want to be involved. I also do styling with them as well.
Cameron Fontaine
So speaking of styling, because that's where I started, what do you find your grooms are doing now? You have more guys going custom, off the rack, rental?...
Amanda Hudes
It's really a mix. Everybody does something different.
Cameron Fontaine
Really.
Amanda Hudes
Yes. I mean, we will go get rentals, some people get custom. It depends on their look. I have very traditional grooms and then I have grooms who want to do something really different. And a lot of grooms are doing two looks…
Amanda Hudes
…I think the grooms felt a little bit slighted when the brides were starting to do two and three looks like, "I looked the same in the pictures and I want to be different too." And so they started doing the two looks and I'm all about it. I'm like okay, let's switch the shoes, let's do this…
Cameron Fontaine
Before we get into the second part where I wanted to dive more into like your experience as a planner, is there anything else you want to share in particular [about how the groom's experience is changing]?
Amanda Hudes
I will say recently I also found grooms to have smaller parties a lot of times. Like even having their kids be a part of their [grooms party] or their siblings or even fathers. A lot of times now, they're having these kind of intimate moments of hanging out with their dad or their best friend who traveled in. And it's just the two of them or it’s just the groom with their kids, if it's a second or even if it’s a first marriage. And so [overall] it's a different kind of dynamic. It's not just the drunk party guys, which also happens. [Overall] I'm seeing more of a bigger variety.
Cameron Fontaine
Ok, where was your favorite wedding? What's the location?
Amanda Hudes
I will say my favorite weddings have been in New Jersey and New York
Cameron Fontaine
Got it.
Amanda Hudes
At this moment, I’m very local to New York, New Jersey, Connecticut, Pennsylvania (the tri-state area). If there's something huge, then I will go international or to a different place outside of this area. But while I have young kids, I'm staying in this area....It's hard to balance life, right?. And a huge priority for me are my kids. So balancing that is not always the easiest with a job that is 24/7.
Cameron Fontaine
And I'm not going to say I haven't had the opportunity yet but I would love love love to do a wedding in the Crystal Plaza since it's been renovated.
Amanda Hudes
So that's one of the venues I work at a bunch. I love them.
Cameron Fontaine
So where's your dream place to do a wedding?
Amanda Hudes
Dream place? Maybe Greece?
Cameron Fontaine
Greece? Which Island?
Amanda Hudes
I've almost gone to Greece twice. And I haven't gone yet but I really want to go; [the pictures and the sunsets look amazing]. So maybe Cyprus [island]. It's funny with all my weddings, I don't need it to be a specific location, or venue or anything. [The space and how I can use the decor] to turn it into [something else is more important to me]. So it'd be a blank canvas, literally a blank canvas, and as long as I have the budget to create something amazing that you don't even know where it is or care, that's my dream. You know, open budget. No budget, there's my dream wedding.
A company that understands how grooms are treated as “an extra” on their wedding day and working to go against that industry practice, it was great to connect with Amanda Hudes from Smiling Through Chaos to learn more about how they bring care, style, and intentionality to their wedding clients on their big day. One of the biggest gems that we took away from our conversation is that the wedding day is a special event and special moment in the couples’ life journey. Therefore, it’s important to find a plannerthat’s committed to being a right fit for the whole couple. To learn more about how Smiling Through Chaos can manage your event, visit their website to schedule a 30 minute complimentary call with Amanda. To learn more about Smiling Through Chaos, make sure to visit their website and follow their socials.
Connect with Smiling Through Chaos
Smiling Through Chaos LLC
Amanda Hudes
Creative Director / Owner
www.SmilingThroughChaos.com
Amanda@SmilingThroughChaos.com
